I was asked today what was going on with my younger son. When family members ask that question, it’s to find out if everyone is working yet or making their way in to society.
I tell them the same thing I tell everyone. That he’s sitting at home right now enjoying what is left of his childhood because when winter is done and we buy him a second hand reliable car (graduation gift), the rest is up to him. He can start off with a part time job if he wants but he will inevitably have to start making his way and paying his own stuff as our older son does now.
When I think of my husband I realize that this is not what happened to him. When he quit/or got thrown out (which was the choices the principal gave him in high school) he was told to find a job. He did and although his mother no longer lived in the childhood home, he was paying rent to live there, he still ended up almost homeless when she informed him that she was selling and he had to leave.
Now some call it tough love and I’m all for that, except, he lived in the country so he had to relocate to the city where he had no car where my dad helped him find a job as airport security.
And from that moment on, work he did. He did end up living in his car when he no longer had a place to live. I don’t think my husband has ever been without a job very long in his lifetime and never for long if at that, but until we hooked back up after high school, I think from my perspective he got treated worse than a dog left out to fend for himself.
He learned the hard way that he was on his own and could not rely on anyone. It’s no wonder we latched on to one another. I know he knows I’ve always looked out for him and he for me and now we both work towards freedom. I want to see him relax and be happy.
As of today we are $22,370 away from being debt free (revolving not mortgage). I can afford to let my younger son have a break before he wanders out there. And I can honestly say that regardless of what happens, we would always make sure they know they have a place in our lives and a roof over their heads.
Especially in cold winters. I never lived in a car, but I know my husband remembers this and probably will never forget it. It shaped the way he views things and you can always see the survivalist in his eyes. Our kids see his way of doing things and I’m glad to say that we keep telling them that they should know this stuff, that is why my kids know how to cook, clean, do dishes manually, wash their own clothes and shovel the yard and pile the wood and start a fire. The stuff that was standard once to learn, (but now not so much now) because their father and myself are teaching them that if they should ever be alone (not unless we die), they can survive. That if one day they find themselves living in a car, they can figure out that you can get free WiFi at Walmart….Kidding!
So if you want to know the status of my life and children. My husband has been working at this job for close to 20 years, myself I am going on 8 at my current job. My older son has started his first full time job working at a cement plant and tells me that most quit the second day on the job since it’s very manual and sometimes lots of hours (younger generation does not want to work). They say they shouldn’t have to work that hard and be slaves to an employer, but I think it’s a cop out and shows a weakness of character for the next generation coming. My younger son is currently at home. He just recently passed his license and in the spring we plan to get him a car so he can find his own way when the weather is fairer and that roads are nicer, to give him a full summer of driving before he joins the rest of us of having to make our way on snow covered grounds.
We are doing just fine, and we support each other and that is all that really matters. The fact that we make sure our family unit knows they will never be alone, thrown out, discarded is important to us.
It would seem that some animals are better at treating each other than we are at one another. But in the end I’m sure that statement does not surprise anyone.
I guess I now understand why some people prefer their dogs to humans.