Let’s face it you will get into a situation where you will be thrown under a bus. Sometimes it’s done deliberately and sometimes it’s not. In either case, it’s not pleasant and always unfortunate.
Here is my two cents on this. Trust your own judgement. If you are doing something and have a bad feeling about it, but feel someone is guiding you erroneously, try to do it the way you feel is alright with you in the first place. Your instincts are there for a reason. They are there to guide you in the right direction.
If you have no choice, as in you have to “Follow Orders”, make sure to let them know after the fact that you know you got thrown under the bus.
The best way to do this I find is to confront the person, then list down what was done or said by you and then what was done and said by them. In almost every case, I have seen recognition of the problem every single time. It’s either greeted with a silence or explanation, and both speak volumes. This is where you find out whether they did it with intention or without.
As I have said before in past blogs, it is absolutely important to keep your emotions out of it. You may get real mad (go somewhere and shake it off, because I have found that cold hard facts and controlled speaking with an even non-emotional, non-committal tone is usually a very good way to handle it.
Pretend you are either a cool lawyer or judge completely detached from the situation presenting cold hard facts.
Bad behavior should not be tolerated and most certainly people should know that they have been caught in the act.
If you don’t let these people know that you are on to them, you will leave them room to think they can do it to you again. And some people are looking for the weakest link and then pounce on it.
Letting them know that you see what they did let them know subconsciously that they are being watched closely and that this did not go unnoticed.
And that is a good thing for you and for future peace of mind (believe me).
Get ready to be viewed as not such a nice person (sorry to say this) but especially if you are a woman it’s a little off kilter like that by both women and men, but there are some people regardless of sex that get the same treatment for being strong or weak.
So my whole point to this blog would be. Be assertive. Keep your cool. And most importantly, once you have made your point, walk away and let it go.
Holding a grudge is not necessary, but being over friendly after such a situation is not good either. Keep your wits about you and most of all, be professional. This will be much more effective in being seen as someone who should be taken seriously.
It sounds simple and it is, and very effective. Hopefully your day is bus free! And may you be confident and smart in everything you do.