It’s a great thing once you really start to observe people and are not just constantly talking.
Such was my journey in the last few days. I had a few epiphanies during that time. I spent time elsewhere other than at my regularly scheduled office.
One epiphany I had is that people are stuck in their thought patterns or what they call their personalities. Some are driven so hard by their insecurities that they create problems to make themselves appear invaluable. Always coming to the rescue to the most mundane of tasks, like putting the paper just so into the printing machine or else the world might come to an end. Never finding the real solution, but the one that no one else can fix other than them.
Some are so stuck in their own circle of crazy that they obsess over things they should not, wasting their time looking at problems where none exist.
Some are so good at manipulation that they can get others to do stuff for them while they sit around doing very little. They act as if they know all and even sometimes demean slightly to put across the fact that they have made themselves the ultimate boss. Giving just the right amount of condescension and praise to keep everyone where they are supposed to.
Some are so scared of their own shadows that they recoil at the sight of others and make themselves scarce even if they are the upper management, making themselves a species all their own.
Others take the time to always dismiss the importance of just about everything, thinking they are above everyone else when they rarely know what is actually going on themselves.
And some like the sound of their own voice so much; they rarely take the time to listen to anyone else, making them one of the worst kinds of antagonist. People who tell you how to do what you already know.
I stared at all of this with complete detachment and it felt like I was watching all that could go wrong with all the distinctive dysfunctional personalities living under the same roof, causing a feeling of tension and resentment.
I could not help but think how sad it really all was. And instead of thinking my spot was completely so much better; I started looking at the people who surround me. The school yard people I must get along with and noticed all their little ways of them or distinctive personalities.
The first being that no one really cares what others do as long as it means they don’t have to do anything.
After going home last night and discussing the things I had seen with my better half, I suddenly found myself thinking how tired I get just observing these things now. How I go back to my plan of just being free of such environments and how wonderful it will feel when the day comes. I feel no more need to fix anyone as I realize that what I perceive needs fixing is just my opinion in reality and would probably do very little to fix their internal workings. The only thing I can control is how much interaction I have to have with these individuals which makes me happy, since I know that if at any point as the days go by and the debt decreases, my choices are getting broader and bigger for me to be able to pick and choose my environment without having to ever subject myself to anything that feels wrong and off.
I think I will simply keep observing and work at being less aggravated by it, and just let it flow around me as I glide through my day with the peace and goals in my mind. I no longer need to do anything I don’t want to. It’s my life and my choice.
What choices does your mind imprison you with today? Are they real or is it a fence you created for yourself? Is it a destructive behavior not only to yourself or even to others around you?
You know with one thought you can get rid of it, right? Who have you quietly observed today? Have you even observed yourself?