Spent the day on course yesterday and had some interesting conversations.
As always, some of us turn the conversation to our kids. And at one point, someone said that they were proud of their kids because they were in university and college and out of their home.
You could see that this person had lots of pride when talking about the children, but it got me thinking.
Dictionary.com defines “proud” as:
1. feeling pleasure or satisfaction over something regarded as highly honorable or creditable to oneself (often followed by of, an infinitive, or a clause).
2. having, proceeding from, or showing a high opinion of one’s own dignity, importance, or superiority.
Being proud of someone when it’s said in a conversation always gives me the impression of someone being superior to others exactly as the definition states.
Something in the sense of that because the kids are out of the house and going to an expensive school, it means that these people are somehow better than everyone else.
So I’ve decided, I don’t want to be proud of anyone, because I don’t want to measure people by their monetary or academic accomplishments.
I don’t believe that makes anyone a special human being for having the luck or inclination to be educated by an establishment and self sufficient.
I went out on my own and went to college. That doesn’t put me below or above anyone.
Don’t get me wrong, there is nothing bad about it, but not the everything when we talk about our kids or anyone for that matter should be about pride. We are more than those things and usually in our lives we come to the conclusion that money and things have very little to do with our true meaning in life.
That is why you see so many people checking out later on in years when they realize this.
Instead, I’d rather say. My kids make me laugh and smile and they are some pretty awesome human beings. I’m sure they will find their paths whatever that might be and I just hope whatever they do in their lives, it will make them happy. I don’t need to be proud of them since pride is part of the ego and we already have far too much of that.
I would suggest to be less impressed by what makes you or them look good and make sure that they have the support, the love and happiness wherever their paths might take them.
I love my kids and I know they might need my need my help and a push to get them going sometimes, but I’m sure they will do just fine in the end. And I don’t need pride for that, I just need to be there for them.